Do we find out the baby's sex?

It's not long to go until me and Chris will be heading to our 20 week scan to see our beautiful bubba through the screen again. And the question on everyone's lips (basically since we found out we were having a baby) is: are you finding out the baby's sex?

To do this day, I'm still unsure. I'm filled with anxiety in both decision.... And even more anxiety about making a decision (anxiety is stupid).

Why I want to find out
I feel like it'll help me bond with the tiny human growing inside me and really kick off the excitement. Of course, I'm excited, sometimes I cannot hide the excitement and jump around a little bit (or a lot - then get told off because I'm clumsy and usually fall over). Other times I'm feeling so poorly that I can so easily disconnect with the baby. I mean, the baby isn't kicking yet, I'm not THAT big (although getting bigger by the day). So I don't know, it's a bit up and down for me and feel knowing the sex will really help me imagine and connect that little bit more.

AND THEN, whenever I see Chris or he texts me during the day he always says "how's my GIRLS?" - which is dead cute, but hang on, what if it's a boy? Will he not be so excited about it? Will he bit a little disappointed? YES I KNOW, of course he will. But it's always a little worry.

To add to this anxiety, (don't call me crazy for saying this) BUT what if it is a boy and we're all out here calling it a she, how's mean is that?! Yeah, baby is none the wiser, but it fills me with a bit of guilt. Is that totally crazy?!

Of course, whenever I talk to friends and family, they're like "you can plan for the baby better if you find out the sex". But that's not really important to me. I'm not one to want to dress the baby in pink if it's a girl or in blue if it's a boy. Obviously, the baby will have gender-related clothes, but I much prefer a baby in neutral colours, like white, yellow, grey. So much cuter and non-stereotypical. I mean a little bubba in yellow - c'mon THAT'S CUTE.

Why a part of me wants to wait
A friend's sister recently had a baby and they didn't find out until she gave birth. My friend was so excited to find out whether she was going to have a niece or nephew, which kind of made my heart go a little crazy. She didn't know. They all had to wait until the baby was born to hear the exciting news.

I mean imagine, in the delivery room, your partner/midwife shouting, "it's a boy", "it has a little winky!" It would just be incredible. Unforgettable. Telling your friends and family, they have a grandson, you've had a baby boy... It would make that phone or call/first meeting so much more special.

But then again, who waits?

Everyone I ask in this day and age, didn't wait. They want to, then when it gets to point in the scan where the lady asks, "do you want to know the baby's sex?" You can't really help but say yes.

I'm still undecided and probably will be until I step foot into that room for the scan. My bet is on us finding out, but who knows? I'll tell all in next week's blog!! Eeeeeek.

And maybe soon, I won't be just buying gender neutral clothes like this:

I'd love to have your thoughts on this! Did you find out? Or are you waiting? Tweet me at @iamayselulu or comment below.